Yes, yes and yes I am now LikedIn. It's almost hysterical. Not to long ago I was complaining about how Facebook and other social networking sites are taking over the world. But now that I am part of this networking network, I'm inviting almost everyone to add me. I'm even emailing people I don't know. I guess that's what it’s all about, a place for professionals and companies to network, to engage in sharing ideas, and a means for the unemployed to get in contact with the employed. Interesting. So far, I have joined four groups; Ruder Finn, Ketchum, PRSA NY and Council of Public Relations. Obviously RF and Ketchum are two establishments I applied to, and the other two organizations I simply joined because it's always good to affiliate yourself with certain organizations--especially if they are related to your field of work.
I was almost tempted to join Twitter, but quickly stopped myself. I mean, I know professionals are encouraging people to use these new sites, but I first need to get comfortable with LinkedIn. I'm still getting used to Facebook, though I've had that since 2005. It’s not that I can't adapt to new media, because I am actually quiet computer savvy, but I'm just not quiet comfortable with the idea of strangers viewing my profile, my pictures etc. I know its not like I'm expecting to date anyone, and the chances of being stalk on the web is slight, it's still just weird. Whatever happened to the telephone, and face to face conversations? Now everything is on the web. I guess I feel as though the web is stripping away our basic communication channels. Whatever, It’s like that saying, “if you can’t beat them join them". I can complain about how much I would prefer to chat with someone over coffee or lunch or chat over the telephone, but at the end of the day I have to shut-up and get with the program. So long as I want to be part of this industry I have no other choice. Can’t wait to see how we communicate 10 yrs from now. Scary!
I just thought of something. All of you out there can view my blog- that's creepy!
Growth of Heart <3
Thursday, March 12, 2009
Wednesday, March 11, 2009
The Buisness Card
So while in the process of writing my thesis, I got bored and created a business card for myself. Yes, a business card. As a student, and a potential new hire for many of the companies out there, business cards are an excellent way for students to promote themselves while leaving behind some pertinent information to catch a potential employer's interest. I once read somewhere that business cards should be carried at all times, and it would only make sense. I believe having a business card shows a sense of professionalism and creates a favorable impression to potential employers. on my card I included my home address, phone number, degree, major, graduation date, and my professional objective. This is one of the many ways I can get myself out there. I also plan on attending seminars and career forums in the next two months, so I will be handing out my business card to any one I believe will help me get where I need to go. With that said, I am jumping back onto my thesis project.
<3 Growth of Heart.
<3 Growth of Heart.
Monday, March 2, 2009
Wednesday, February 25, 2009
Hanging In There
School is officially overwhelming. I hate it, and I cannot wait until the third Sunday in May to get the hell out of here! OK- let me rephrase that. School is officially overwhelming. I despise stressing over classes I have no interest for, and that have no relevance to the field I am pushing to pursue. Much better! My Bio professor whom I will refer to as Ms. Mean is unbelievably difficult and has no consideration for 70% of the class that have no clue as to half of the material she teaches. Its not even the work that bothers me, because I understand that we are required to attend class, participate and do all assignments. The problem is Ms. Mean is notoriously mean. After a student asked what our first exam would cover, her answer almost sent the majority of the class into an uproar. She explained that it was our responsibility to figure out what would be on the exam and our responsibility to do well. Now we have covered almost 4 to 5 chapters and there is so much material from both notes and text- I guess my weekend will consist of reading 5 chapters of BS.
Okay- I know I am quite late with this, but I figured I write about it anyway. On valentines day I woke up expecting to stay home all day just to avoid the lovebirds that would swarm all of NYC and Jersey. I sat in bed reminiscing about my past Valentines day experience and how special the day was for all those in love. Everything about it. For me it was knowing someone who loved me was on his way to take me out, to spend quality time with me, to treat me extra special and to attempt to build on the day of love. I didn't really care about the gifts-even thought they were expected, and I did treasure each and every one of them, even the ones I ate. I though back to what I(we) did last year and began to yearned for it. I am sure I looked miserable, because my younger sister barged into my room, asked me if I was okay, and gently walked out again. I had been crying. I couldn't help it. I had managed to not cry for good while, not thinking about him, but the mention of love just turned my stomach. As I sat in bed reminiscing about my past valentines day experiences, I sadly realized that I had become bitter. I mean, in the past I've seen my single friends cringe at the site of roses and hearts, but I never really cared about the day- even when I was single. Now I feel bitter and hurt and wished for the day to be over. Ironically everyone wanted to call me to see if I was okay, but that only pissed me off. I ignored all my calls that day, and went to spend the weekend with my cousins.
While at my cousins house, I was disturbed by how ungrateful my youngest cousin was. Her date, a young usher from church, had been the perfect gentleman and she was complaining about how he took her to an Italian restaurant, and bought her roses instead of chocolate. Now after hearing her complain about his flaws and how much she really had no interest in him, I asked my self this. Why is it that when a good female is looking for someone to get serious with, all the good guys are taken- primarily by girls who could care less about the most important things in life such as liking the person for who they are? The good females are always stuck having to suffer at the hands of men who attempt to play the role for however long they can and then vanish as though they were never there. What I am trying to say is- as faithful, honest and loving as I am, I couldn't hold on to someone I really loved, someone I thought was the right man- the good man, yet here this girl is with a true gentlemen in front of her and she is taking him for granted as well as leading him on. I am sorry, This makes me all the more bitter.
Someday is what I keep saying. But for now. I need to focus on me. I must admit, I miss the company, the outings, the laughter, I miss cooking for him, taking him his lunch on the weekends and taking the time to do the little things that really mattered in our relationship, but I think I can wait for it now. Some days when I'm by myself I dial his number and hang up before it rings. I think I only do it to keep his number in my mind, even though I desperately want to delete it from my memory. I try not to pray for him at times but end up doing so, but then feel stupid after, because I convince myself that he has forgot me. It seems like it. Moving on is tough, but with school, my internship and trying to get into different programs and begin my future I will be okay.
Just Hanging in there.
Growth Of Heart<3
Okay- I know I am quite late with this, but I figured I write about it anyway. On valentines day I woke up expecting to stay home all day just to avoid the lovebirds that would swarm all of NYC and Jersey. I sat in bed reminiscing about my past Valentines day experience and how special the day was for all those in love. Everything about it. For me it was knowing someone who loved me was on his way to take me out, to spend quality time with me, to treat me extra special and to attempt to build on the day of love. I didn't really care about the gifts-even thought they were expected, and I did treasure each and every one of them, even the ones I ate. I though back to what I(we) did last year and began to yearned for it. I am sure I looked miserable, because my younger sister barged into my room, asked me if I was okay, and gently walked out again. I had been crying. I couldn't help it. I had managed to not cry for good while, not thinking about him, but the mention of love just turned my stomach. As I sat in bed reminiscing about my past valentines day experiences, I sadly realized that I had become bitter. I mean, in the past I've seen my single friends cringe at the site of roses and hearts, but I never really cared about the day- even when I was single. Now I feel bitter and hurt and wished for the day to be over. Ironically everyone wanted to call me to see if I was okay, but that only pissed me off. I ignored all my calls that day, and went to spend the weekend with my cousins.
While at my cousins house, I was disturbed by how ungrateful my youngest cousin was. Her date, a young usher from church, had been the perfect gentleman and she was complaining about how he took her to an Italian restaurant, and bought her roses instead of chocolate. Now after hearing her complain about his flaws and how much she really had no interest in him, I asked my self this. Why is it that when a good female is looking for someone to get serious with, all the good guys are taken- primarily by girls who could care less about the most important things in life such as liking the person for who they are? The good females are always stuck having to suffer at the hands of men who attempt to play the role for however long they can and then vanish as though they were never there. What I am trying to say is- as faithful, honest and loving as I am, I couldn't hold on to someone I really loved, someone I thought was the right man- the good man, yet here this girl is with a true gentlemen in front of her and she is taking him for granted as well as leading him on. I am sorry, This makes me all the more bitter.
Someday is what I keep saying. But for now. I need to focus on me. I must admit, I miss the company, the outings, the laughter, I miss cooking for him, taking him his lunch on the weekends and taking the time to do the little things that really mattered in our relationship, but I think I can wait for it now. Some days when I'm by myself I dial his number and hang up before it rings. I think I only do it to keep his number in my mind, even though I desperately want to delete it from my memory. I try not to pray for him at times but end up doing so, but then feel stupid after, because I convince myself that he has forgot me. It seems like it. Moving on is tough, but with school, my internship and trying to get into different programs and begin my future I will be okay.
Just Hanging in there.
Growth Of Heart<3
Wednesday, February 18, 2009
How to Write an Elevator Pitch
While in the process of teaching myself the fundamentals of PR, I stumbled upon crafting an elevator pitch. Now as easy as it is to write a press release about myself, I am finding it difficult to write a 30-60 second elevator pitch. What bothers me the most is that last week I wrote and pitched over the phone to various T.V and radio networks for one of our clients at my internship, so how is it that I am having difficulty constructing one for myself? I have Googled, and consulted my text yet, no success. What is a girl to do?
On the flip side of that all, over the last few weeks, I have been doing a lot of research and cold-calling to various PR firms. Although I would love to jump right into an entry-level position or even a junior account position at many of the places I wish to apply at, I feel as though I'm not ready. So because of this, I plan on applying for another internship- hopefully one that pays and offers training programs. I have already applied to Ruder Finn, a highly recognized PR firm with an excellent training program for college grads, and I am praying to get the opportunity to work under such a prestige establishment, as well as grace their beautiful building proudly. I will be applying to various others perhaps even some out of the New York tri-state area. I mean, I really want to stay in NY. I live in NJ approximately 30mins away (closer than some New Yorkers who live in other boroughs), and I am applying to NYU, Farleigh Dickinson and maybe even Fordham University for grad school. I am schedule to take the GRE test at the end of March- so wish me luck.
Other than that all, I am washing myself clean of shyness- this year I will be bold enough to network with different people. Now, I don’t want you thinking I am not a people person, because I most definitely am. But, I tend to loosen up when I actually get to know people. So, this is why the elevator pitch is so important to me. I love to talk and make friends, but how do you do all that meeting someone on the line at Starbucks or on the subway even? So like I said, this year I vow to talk to everyone possible-minus bums. On my way to and from the city I see and stand by so many different business people. The possibility of half those people I sit next to on the bus or train being linked to the profession I want to desperately learn more about is tremendous. So, I ask again, how difficult is it for someone as talkative and opinionated as me to say a simple hello, smile or talk about the weather (on the smile note-New Yorkers don’t smile- It is a fact)?
Anyway I even plan on networking on Facebook. Yes. For all those who don’t know me, I am the type to ignore people on my friends request list all because I don’t know them (due to a stalker incident in the past). But I have attempted to add people who interest me (professional interest), and people who's blogs I am following. Not that there’s many. lol
But anyhow I’m tired- reading then knocking myself out for a long day tomorrow. :)
Growth of Heart.
On the flip side of that all, over the last few weeks, I have been doing a lot of research and cold-calling to various PR firms. Although I would love to jump right into an entry-level position or even a junior account position at many of the places I wish to apply at, I feel as though I'm not ready. So because of this, I plan on applying for another internship- hopefully one that pays and offers training programs. I have already applied to Ruder Finn, a highly recognized PR firm with an excellent training program for college grads, and I am praying to get the opportunity to work under such a prestige establishment, as well as grace their beautiful building proudly. I will be applying to various others perhaps even some out of the New York tri-state area. I mean, I really want to stay in NY. I live in NJ approximately 30mins away (closer than some New Yorkers who live in other boroughs), and I am applying to NYU, Farleigh Dickinson and maybe even Fordham University for grad school. I am schedule to take the GRE test at the end of March- so wish me luck.
Other than that all, I am washing myself clean of shyness- this year I will be bold enough to network with different people. Now, I don’t want you thinking I am not a people person, because I most definitely am. But, I tend to loosen up when I actually get to know people. So, this is why the elevator pitch is so important to me. I love to talk and make friends, but how do you do all that meeting someone on the line at Starbucks or on the subway even? So like I said, this year I vow to talk to everyone possible-minus bums. On my way to and from the city I see and stand by so many different business people. The possibility of half those people I sit next to on the bus or train being linked to the profession I want to desperately learn more about is tremendous. So, I ask again, how difficult is it for someone as talkative and opinionated as me to say a simple hello, smile or talk about the weather (on the smile note-New Yorkers don’t smile- It is a fact)?
Anyway I even plan on networking on Facebook. Yes. For all those who don’t know me, I am the type to ignore people on my friends request list all because I don’t know them (due to a stalker incident in the past). But I have attempted to add people who interest me (professional interest), and people who's blogs I am following. Not that there’s many. lol
But anyhow I’m tired- reading then knocking myself out for a long day tomorrow. :)
Growth of Heart.
Friday, February 13, 2009
What Is Change???
What is change? I realized that change is inevitable, and it can happen at anytime- last December change smacked me dead in the face. And as much as I wanted to fight it I just couldn't. I got out of the most serious relationship I have ever been in- this was change. I needed to come to the realization that this person was not the individual I was meant to be with- this was change. I changed my surroundings, and I needed to learn how to be alone again- this was change. All of these changes forced me to reevaluate myself and I realized that it was time for me to focus on me- and pursue my future career.
Now I know you all think I am really young, and probably thinking- this girl has seen nothing yet. But, to me, what I went through was bigger then big. I hate to admit this but I was in love. Trust me it wasn't puppy love. I never thought I could feel this way about someone other then my family. He was my best friend, my confidant, and the love of my 21 years of living. Its weird- If you know me personally- you know I don't talk like this. I use to be the girl that refused to open herself up to anyone. I use to hate expressing my emotions because I feared being vulnerable. And now look at me, I fell head over heals and landed flat on my face. "I should have known it was too good to be true" I say. Everything was almost too perfect- how could I have not seen it coming? I was ready to settle with a guy I had only know for a little over a year- How naive could I be. I was so stupid to compare our relationship with what my parents have- how dare I.
Now I know what you are thinking- This girl is crazy-but to be honest, I don't think I can look at another guy again. I mean, I don't get how someone can profess their love for another just to end it all over something that isn't justifiable.(situation is far too complex for me to go into detail online). Anyway back to change. I changed the way I used my free time, I changed my hair, my bed sheets(not trying to say I never changed that) I changed everything that reminded me of him music, food, everything. I love ice-skating in the winter, and since we broke up I can’t see myself skating again. (Not like I have anyone to go with) Moving on- change is something that can be either good or bad. While so many different things have sprung out from this breakup, most of the changes I have made are actually good. I spend my free time at Barnes and Noble, reading which I stopped doing. I began to write again. because I realized that my writing was not as good as it use to be, I began going to church more often and came to the ultimate realization. God is the only love of my life. Not any man, not my mom, dad, siblings, friends--No one will ever love me as much as God does, and when I realized this my heart caved with sadness. Why? Because all this time I was so focused on myself and my boyfriend and family and friends that I failed to acknowledge the power behind my life. When I think about all the times I didn’t get into an accident, or get hit by a bus or taxi, I realize that God has really protected me and blessed e with many things. Some people don’t even live to see their twenty-first b-days, and here I am living my life without God- but now that’s all changed. My parents are devout Christians and I now understand my mother when she says she can smell the Lords presence around her- how beautiful is that. Shoot, I want to smell Gods presence around me, how does it smell?
Okay, albeit I say that I am healing- the staggering process is rather annoying. I miss having company, getting all dressed up to impress him, putting makeup on even though he says I don’t need it, and waking up expecting a phone call. I miss it all. I don’t have many friends anymore and the ones that are around all have their own lives to worry about- and I don’t hold them to that. I stopped believing in best friends awhile ago when I realized there is no such thing as best friends. I mean you can have close friends, but for me I have high standards for someone when I call them my best friend. I’ve been friends with some girls that just hurt me in so many ways you would think I was hurt by a guy. Jealousy and competition- all unnecessary situations I had to put up with. So after a few horrible experiences I pulled myself back and decided it would be best to maintain a close friendship with someone but, maintain distance.
My close friend Ms. Grant is one I hold dearly in my heart- I love this child to death and I take her as my younger sister. When I had no one to turn to I called her- and even though she was too far to come hang hug me, she reassured me that my life was going to move on. She is a rare person- and I love that about her. I know I can always call her to edit my writing pieces and talk to her forever about absolutely anything and nothing. lol.
Another close friend(s) of mine would be my childhood girls. Margaret and Henrietta, I love these two. I have known them for as long as I can remember, and albeit we grown apart and all gone our separate ways, I love when we all get together to just catch up. My twenty first b-day the both of them came all the way from Virginia to come celebrate with me. Thank you.
Lastly, my little sister- she is extremely annoying, but the little girl looks up to me with eager eyes- so, I am always pressured to set a good example for her. She is turning seventeen, so I constantly advise her to stay focused and leave the boys alone. When I have no one to talk to I can always count on her to lend her ears, and although many times she may not know what to say to her big sister, her eyes and her attitude show that she feels for me.
Now I know that I have strayed from my main topic, but to end this long post, I want to emphasis on the word change. Change is definitely inevitable and it will hit you one way or another. But, it’s how we handle the changes that really determine whether we are using it to our advantage to transform our lives or just simply sitting back to feel sorry for ourselves. As for me- I know that I am going to be something greater then anyone ever expected. It may not be next year or the next, but I will make a name for myself. I will succeed, find true love, happiness and live my life to the fullest. (I know I sound churchy, but hey-)
<3>
Now I know you all think I am really young, and probably thinking- this girl has seen nothing yet. But, to me, what I went through was bigger then big. I hate to admit this but I was in love. Trust me it wasn't puppy love. I never thought I could feel this way about someone other then my family. He was my best friend, my confidant, and the love of my 21 years of living. Its weird- If you know me personally- you know I don't talk like this. I use to be the girl that refused to open herself up to anyone. I use to hate expressing my emotions because I feared being vulnerable. And now look at me, I fell head over heals and landed flat on my face. "I should have known it was too good to be true" I say. Everything was almost too perfect- how could I have not seen it coming? I was ready to settle with a guy I had only know for a little over a year- How naive could I be. I was so stupid to compare our relationship with what my parents have- how dare I.
Now I know what you are thinking- This girl is crazy-but to be honest, I don't think I can look at another guy again. I mean, I don't get how someone can profess their love for another just to end it all over something that isn't justifiable.(situation is far too complex for me to go into detail online). Anyway back to change. I changed the way I used my free time, I changed my hair, my bed sheets(not trying to say I never changed that) I changed everything that reminded me of him music, food, everything. I love ice-skating in the winter, and since we broke up I can’t see myself skating again. (Not like I have anyone to go with) Moving on- change is something that can be either good or bad. While so many different things have sprung out from this breakup, most of the changes I have made are actually good. I spend my free time at Barnes and Noble, reading which I stopped doing. I began to write again. because I realized that my writing was not as good as it use to be, I began going to church more often and came to the ultimate realization. God is the only love of my life. Not any man, not my mom, dad, siblings, friends--No one will ever love me as much as God does, and when I realized this my heart caved with sadness. Why? Because all this time I was so focused on myself and my boyfriend and family and friends that I failed to acknowledge the power behind my life. When I think about all the times I didn’t get into an accident, or get hit by a bus or taxi, I realize that God has really protected me and blessed e with many things. Some people don’t even live to see their twenty-first b-days, and here I am living my life without God- but now that’s all changed. My parents are devout Christians and I now understand my mother when she says she can smell the Lords presence around her- how beautiful is that. Shoot, I want to smell Gods presence around me, how does it smell?
Okay, albeit I say that I am healing- the staggering process is rather annoying. I miss having company, getting all dressed up to impress him, putting makeup on even though he says I don’t need it, and waking up expecting a phone call. I miss it all. I don’t have many friends anymore and the ones that are around all have their own lives to worry about- and I don’t hold them to that. I stopped believing in best friends awhile ago when I realized there is no such thing as best friends. I mean you can have close friends, but for me I have high standards for someone when I call them my best friend. I’ve been friends with some girls that just hurt me in so many ways you would think I was hurt by a guy. Jealousy and competition- all unnecessary situations I had to put up with. So after a few horrible experiences I pulled myself back and decided it would be best to maintain a close friendship with someone but, maintain distance.
My close friend Ms. Grant is one I hold dearly in my heart- I love this child to death and I take her as my younger sister. When I had no one to turn to I called her- and even though she was too far to come hang hug me, she reassured me that my life was going to move on. She is a rare person- and I love that about her. I know I can always call her to edit my writing pieces and talk to her forever about absolutely anything and nothing. lol.
Another close friend(s) of mine would be my childhood girls. Margaret and Henrietta, I love these two. I have known them for as long as I can remember, and albeit we grown apart and all gone our separate ways, I love when we all get together to just catch up. My twenty first b-day the both of them came all the way from Virginia to come celebrate with me. Thank you.
Lastly, my little sister- she is extremely annoying, but the little girl looks up to me with eager eyes- so, I am always pressured to set a good example for her. She is turning seventeen, so I constantly advise her to stay focused and leave the boys alone. When I have no one to talk to I can always count on her to lend her ears, and although many times she may not know what to say to her big sister, her eyes and her attitude show that she feels for me.
Now I know that I have strayed from my main topic, but to end this long post, I want to emphasis on the word change. Change is definitely inevitable and it will hit you one way or another. But, it’s how we handle the changes that really determine whether we are using it to our advantage to transform our lives or just simply sitting back to feel sorry for ourselves. As for me- I know that I am going to be something greater then anyone ever expected. It may not be next year or the next, but I will make a name for myself. I will succeed, find true love, happiness and live my life to the fullest. (I know I sound churchy, but hey-)
<3>
Thursday, February 12, 2009
SO MUCH TO SAY
OK, so I haven’t been on here much, but that’s because my wacky schedule has left me no time to breathe or relax. Anyway- where should I begin? This semester is by far the semester from hell. My Bio 100 professor is real hardcore, and gives us more work than my writing professors. I have a lab due each week and a bunch of other nonsense I will forget once the course is over. My thesis class- yeah, this one is going to be interesting. All the students in that class are creative writing majors so; of course they all want to compose short stories and books about extra-terrestrial beings and gory crap while me and this other PR girl look completely lost as to what we can do. My professor for this class (real clown completely full of himself- but always has the best stories) advised us to come up with a campaign. A CAMPAIGN FOR WHAT???? I swear this school makes me so mad- I cannot wait to leave. Since I have been here- they have taught me absolutely nothing regarding the field I want so desperately to learn about. I am even considering joining the PRSA NY Chapter just to invest in myself, because so much time has been wasted.
Okay I need to cool down-but as long as I have my Lord Jesus Christ, I will pass and move on to bigger and better things. My class schedule is light-four classes plus my internship (which I am getting credit for), and the commute to and from Connecticut, New York and New Jersey is often annoying, but I'll do what I have to do until May.
I am also on a speedy recovery to healing, but Valentines day is in two days and despite the fact that I've been playing ‘blind’ to the stupid holiday (if it is a holiday), I can’t help but feel a pinch of sadness when I see red and pink hearts. To be quiet honest, it reopens that damn hole that I have been trying to fill up. And although I complain about being extremely busy- it all keeps me from breaking down when I am alone. Whatever-
Onto more important things, today I knocked down one major wall. I finally finished with the four essays I have been working on for weeks for this training program. And though I feel like finally submitting it has taken a load off my shoulders, I am going to be stuck wondering who is reading my work, how are the reading it, did I fail to notice any errors (Lord knows, I hate editing my own work- as you can probably see all my errors in this blog- But I got professional eyes to check out all my writing pieces), and how many people are they planning to select? I am pretty sure a lot of students applied. I mean, with the financial crisis and all, there’s not much career opportunity for many of us to look forward to, so applying to a program like this is something many people will look forward to. All I can do now is beg the good Lord to touch those who pick up my material- I really want this. Not just because I need something after May, but because I feel like this will be a starting point into a career I have basically taught myself about. The owner of the company/firm I work for now inspires me- everything about her, makes me look up to her. She is ambitious and loves the business she has invested everything into, and that’s what I want- I want to love what I do and help organizations improve their markets, and build and maintain relationships (because I can’t seem to maintain my own- side thought). I have only been here for 2 months and I have learned so much about PR than ever. I use to think that being a PR practitioner was cute and (hip-if I may), but now I know so much more- and it’s exactly what I want to do. More on this topic another time.
I know I have been bouncing off at different topics, but I just wanted to type out my frustrations- at least some of it.
My fingers are tired.
Gnite<3
Okay I need to cool down-but as long as I have my Lord Jesus Christ, I will pass and move on to bigger and better things. My class schedule is light-four classes plus my internship (which I am getting credit for), and the commute to and from Connecticut, New York and New Jersey is often annoying, but I'll do what I have to do until May.
I am also on a speedy recovery to healing, but Valentines day is in two days and despite the fact that I've been playing ‘blind’ to the stupid holiday (if it is a holiday), I can’t help but feel a pinch of sadness when I see red and pink hearts. To be quiet honest, it reopens that damn hole that I have been trying to fill up. And although I complain about being extremely busy- it all keeps me from breaking down when I am alone. Whatever-
Onto more important things, today I knocked down one major wall. I finally finished with the four essays I have been working on for weeks for this training program. And though I feel like finally submitting it has taken a load off my shoulders, I am going to be stuck wondering who is reading my work, how are the reading it, did I fail to notice any errors (Lord knows, I hate editing my own work- as you can probably see all my errors in this blog- But I got professional eyes to check out all my writing pieces), and how many people are they planning to select? I am pretty sure a lot of students applied. I mean, with the financial crisis and all, there’s not much career opportunity for many of us to look forward to, so applying to a program like this is something many people will look forward to. All I can do now is beg the good Lord to touch those who pick up my material- I really want this. Not just because I need something after May, but because I feel like this will be a starting point into a career I have basically taught myself about. The owner of the company/firm I work for now inspires me- everything about her, makes me look up to her. She is ambitious and loves the business she has invested everything into, and that’s what I want- I want to love what I do and help organizations improve their markets, and build and maintain relationships (because I can’t seem to maintain my own- side thought). I have only been here for 2 months and I have learned so much about PR than ever. I use to think that being a PR practitioner was cute and (hip-if I may), but now I know so much more- and it’s exactly what I want to do. More on this topic another time.
I know I have been bouncing off at different topics, but I just wanted to type out my frustrations- at least some of it.
My fingers are tired.
Gnite<3
Friday, January 16, 2009
I have no Eyelashes.
To make a long story short, a few weeks ago two of my friends and I went and got our eyelashes enhanced. Meaning- we went to these Indians in Brooklyn NY who inserted/glued fiber lashes onto our eyelids and paid $15.00 for them. Sure, I looked glamorous for 2 weeks or so, however after three weeks I noticed that the glue was no longer under my lids, but attached to my actual lashes. Freaking out, I dabbed olive oil on my lids and continuously washed my face in hopes that they would fall out. Instead the unthinkable happened. As the lashes got weak and strands of them began to fall out, I noticed that my natural lashes were thinning(Now- I had beautiful eyelashes and they were full and long; I had only enhanced them for a more glamorous look for this fashion show I was attending). By the time I pulled and yanked the lashes off, all my hair was coming out along with the extensions! My hair was just GONE and I looked BALD! I looked like a female cartoon character with no eyelashes! I attempted to lift up what was left with mascara but only picked up about 10 strands on each side. I even tried to put DOGRO(hair growing product) on my mascara brush but that only stung my eyes. Embarrassing!
Any how this morning I went into McDonald's to buy breakfast and I noticed a man who had more eyelashes than me. Can you believe that??? a man has thicker, longer and fuller lashes than ME. I was SO jealous. Now I have to wait 4 to 8 weeks for my lashes to grow back. And trust me, I have learned my lesson- I'm sticking with what I got.
Any how this morning I went into McDonald's to buy breakfast and I noticed a man who had more eyelashes than me. Can you believe that??? a man has thicker, longer and fuller lashes than ME. I was SO jealous. Now I have to wait 4 to 8 weeks for my lashes to grow back. And trust me, I have learned my lesson- I'm sticking with what I got.
Wednesday, January 14, 2009
OK. So I am just getting out of a yr long relationship with someone I thought I was going to be with forever, and I am seriously nothing but a horrible mess. For about a month I cried, lost my appetite and lost interest in everything and anyone who dared breathed hello. I felt as though my world caved in on me and I was suffocating. He was my first boyfriend and I love(d) him. I still cant believe its really over, because I did not see this coming. After our breakup, I found myself attending church, and to be honest it was my safe haven. It was the only place where I could be around people, listen to music, and above all, praise the only one who is really and truly the love of my life-God! The only place I feel at peace is when I am at church, and no- I am not a very spiritual person ( or at least I wasn't). Before my breakup I was fully living my life without Christ. Sure, I knew God and I loved him, but I didn't walk with him. I only prayed when I needed something, or prayed for good fortune, but I didn't pray for mercy or grace over my soul. I did a lot of things that I regret, but now I know that I have been forgiven. I am still trying to let go of him( I hate the term 'ex'), and move on but it is so hard for me to do. I dream about him, I see him when I look at other people, and I am constantly tempted to pick up the phone and curse him out, but I have too much pride for that. We attempted to continue to talk and be friends, but that only drove me crazy. Yesterday I was told he was communicating with someone (via Facebook) and I got so upset that I removed him from my friends list on Facebook and deleted all our pictures. While I am sitting here praying for us to get back together, he's off having fun and moving on. I feel so empty inside. I am so upset, and I cant stop crying.
Lost.
Hi everyone.
So over the past couple of months I have been on a journey searching for "myself", and a spiritual connection with God. I am at a point in my life where I am experiencing so many different things at once. I constantly find myself overwhelmed, sad, lonely and confused. I will soon be graduating this upcoming May, and the pressures of "what next", is becoming more of a hassel(especially during the economic crisis). Any how, this blog is my journal(made public) of how I will figure my life out, and about people who are in and out of my life.
So over the past couple of months I have been on a journey searching for "myself", and a spiritual connection with God. I am at a point in my life where I am experiencing so many different things at once. I constantly find myself overwhelmed, sad, lonely and confused. I will soon be graduating this upcoming May, and the pressures of "what next", is becoming more of a hassel(especially during the economic crisis). Any how, this blog is my journal(made public) of how I will figure my life out, and about people who are in and out of my life.
Subscribe to:
Comments (Atom)
